Monday, May 17, 2010

Calling all Lonely Housewives

It's been over a year since my post on swinging -- the one about how DB is a hotbed of intra-marital gymnastics, and I've come to believe that this whole swinging thing is really just a myth.  I've become friends with many couples who live in the Marina and all claim to be swing-averse.  I've also never seen a box of detergent in any DB window.  Chalk it up to urban legend, I said.

Similarly I scoffed at the rumor about DB housewives being prone to having affairs with tennis instructors, maintenance men, etc.  "Why?" I thought. "Just because we're home alone a lot?"  That's as bad as the one about us all being ladies who lunch, play tennis, hand our kids over to helpers and blog about our inane lives...  Wait a minute!

Of course, there was that posting on an Asia expat chat board I read before leaving NYC -- something along the lines of "DB has total MILFs; a friend of mine is a repairman and he always gets laid out there on jobs." Another boastful man making up stories, I thought.

Then one night a few weeks ago I'm on the Discovery Bay forum -- a place where residents hiding behind anonymous monikers bitch about fellow neighbors, ask for restaurant recommendations, rat out bad helpers, complain about the ferry/supermarket/bus/(insert topic here).  It's an online microcosm of our community and where a lot of shit goes down.

So I'm on there and see a posting from a man named Thom.  It went something like this: "Looking for any lonely housewives or girlfriends who want to have a good time.  Send me a private message if you're interested." Is this guy for real?  Maybe this is some kind of experiment where they see just who and how many respond in earnest.  (I did not, for the record.)

Before I could get too far in my pondering I saw that Thom got a response (a public one) that read, "Geez Thom, can you be any more desperate, mate?"  This, btw, was written by some guy named "Big Schlong".

I kid you not.

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